


Or So John Thinks

by silverskyfullofstars



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: John is oblivious, Multi, john is a bit jealous and confused, johnlock forever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-12-01 10:49:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11484807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverskyfullofstars/pseuds/silverskyfullofstars
Summary: John contemplates the many relationships of Sherlock Holmes.





	Or So John Thinks

Sherlock has had many possible relationships over the years. Or so John thinks.

The first must have been Victor Trevor. John didn’t know about him until Sherrinford and Musgrave, but it was obvious that he was Sherlock’s closest friend - possibly the only one he ever had until John. Given time, Sherlock probably would have grown to love Victor in a way that goes deeper than friendship. But Victor Trevor is dead, and Sherlock isn’t pining.

The next person John can think of is Lestrade. Though obviously not a romantic interest, Lestrade came into Sherlock’s life at a crucial point. If not for his friendship and the ebb and flow of new cases, Sherlock’s drug use might have killed him in his twenties or early thirties. Lestrade was never a candidate for love, but his friendship with Sherlock has made Sherlock the person he is now. A great man - and a good one.

Molly will always enter John’s thoughts at some point when he thinks about Sherlock. It’s obvious to everyone but Sherlock that Molly is head-over-heels for him. Has been for a long time. Sherlock seems to know in his subconscious, but he can’t really comprehend how deep her feelings go. Sometimes he seems to reciprocate, but John can’t be sure. There were certainly times when Sherlock kissed her cheek, usually after a major screw-up where he’d said or done something incredibly hurtful, but John can’t say what Sherlock’s actual feelings are. If he looked, really looked, he might have noticed that Sherlock cares for Molly in the way of a sister, friend, or even could-have-been lover. If Sherlock were a different person, perhaps the narrative would change. But Sherlock is who he is.

Irene Adler. The Woman. If John could put a name to the feeling that coils inside of him when he hears her name, it would be jealousy. There was definitely interest on her part. Showing up stark naked the first time their paths had crossed wasn’t just a strategy to make sure she couldn’t be deduced. It was meant to unnerve them, to test them. Irene Adler was as much a proper genius as Sherlock or Moriarty, but Sherlock was easily a match for her intellectually. She seemed to think they were a match for each other in other ways. But again, if John had observed, he would have seen that Sherlock took no more notice of Irene except to note her measurements - the code for the safe they needed to open. Sherlock never responded to Irene’s advances, though she made many. Fifty-seven texts, John said he heard. Sherlock answered once, maybe twice. “Happy New Year.” He never replied to the numerous requests for dinner, never seemed to be swayed by her charm. The Woman may have considered Sherlock Holmes, but Irene Adler was never a choice for Sherlock - simply an intellectual rival. A partner in a duel of wit and cunning, who deserved respect for a game well-played. But nothing more.

Moriarty. John never thought he would consider the name. But if he thought about it, the man had subtly (and not-so-subtly) flirted with Sherlock on several occasions. The first time they met, with Moriarty posing as “Jim from IT,” the consulting criminal left his number under a metal dish. Sherlock, aloof as ever, had deduced Jim’s sexual orientation and the phone number within minutes. No reaction. Then, at the pool, some of their conversation could almost be classified as flirting, though Sherlock’s voice held thinly masked but controlled rage at seeing John captured with a bomb strapped to his chest, just like the other victims of Moriarty’s little game. A sniper trained on him, ready to shoot at a moment’s notice if Sherlock doesn’t jump. Jim Moriarty just wanted to watch Sherlock dance, where’s the harm? The harm is in harming John.

Because there is one person John never thought to add to the list. The one who Sherlock always spends time with, the one he listens to, the one he respects. The one he laughs with, the one he composes for, the one he spends exhilarating nights with chasing criminals down the streets of London. The one he faked his death for - jumped for, fell for, and in more ways than one. The one he was tortured for, the one he was nearly sent on a suicide mission for. The one person John never thought of as the candidate is the one Sherlock has always loved. The man who sees himself as easily dispensable is the one who has saved Sherlock again and again - from cases gone wrong, from Moriarty, from the pull of the drugs, from the danger he poses to himself. John grounds Sherlock, keeps him right. His army doctor, his blogger, his whole life, his whole world. His conductor of light.

_John Watson. It’s always been you._


End file.
